Laugh Till You Cry

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Whatever you are doing at this very moment can be made better by a bit of laughter. Okay, probably not heart surgery, but you get the idea. So without further delay, it is time to laugh to these quotes, thoughts and ramblings.

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any other invention, with the possible exceptions of handguns and Tequilla. – Mitch Ratcliffe

Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana…The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can’t remember what they are. – Matt Lauer

I sold my house this week. I got a pretty good price for it, but it made my landlord mad as hell. – Garry Shandling

If you put garbage in a computer nothing comes out but garbage. But this garbage, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow ennobled and none dare criticize it. – Anonymous

There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. – Douglas Adams

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move. – Douglas Adams

Every woman should have four pets in her life. A mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass who pays for everything. – Paris Hilton

The reason women don’t play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public. – Phyllis Diller

I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix. – Dan Quayle

Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones. – Mike Barfield

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are both disappointed. – Albert Einstein

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. – Robert A. Heinlein

Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. – Benjamin Franklin

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers. – Homer Simpson

Football combines two of the worst things in American life. It is violence punctuated by committee meetings. – George Will

Aazdak Alisimo likes a good laugh just like anyone else, particularly funny quotes updated each and every day at FunnyQuotesDaily.com.

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MLA Style Citation:
Alisimo, Aazdak "Laugh Till You Cry." Laugh Till You Cry. 18 Feb. 2010. uberarticles.com. 6 Apr 2012 <http://uberarticles.com/miscellaneous/laugh-till-you-cry/>.

APA Style Citation:
Alisimo, A (2010, February 18). Laugh Till You Cry. Retrieved April 6, 2012, from http://uberarticles.com/miscellaneous/laugh-till-you-cry/

Chicago Style Citation:
Alisimo, Aazdak "Laugh Till You Cry" uberarticles.com. http://uberarticles.com/miscellaneous/laugh-till-you-cry/

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